It’s been too long…

Yesterday was Bowen’s 11th birthday, prompting me to read my blog posts from times long since passed. As I was reading, I came across some replies to my posts from my friend Jenny. Jenny really has me thinking a lot lately. After all, she’s the reason I started blogging to begin with. Her family has been very influential to me. More about that later…
With all the change in our lives lately, we’ve been out of sorts. Mason graduating, moving to Tyler, leaving friends, changing schools (for two kids, twice), and Mason moving from home to college (5 hrs. from me), not to mention some struggles not fit for print. It’s been a lot on this wife & mama of four. She has not done very well with everything. Don’t get me wrong, we are moving in a very positive forward direction. Here’s the thing, in some ways I’ve been trying to resist change because sometimes it causes discomfort and even pain. In case you don’t know me very well, I’ll go ahead and tell you that I do not like change or pain. I mean, don’t get me wrong, change is good sometimes. We love our new church and our new house is a lovely blessing. It’s huge and I love it. You would think with all of this goodness, that I would have a genuine smile on my face. Not so much. In fact I am sure there a lot of people at church and most certainly at the schools who now have the opinion that I am certifiably crazy. I mean, what would you think of someone who constantly had tears welling up in their eyes. People have been very kind and gracious and concerned and sweet. Again, tears. Really. Nut job. It’s really bad when someone asks me how we are doing and I can’t for the life of me manage to be convincing that everything is going well. It is. It is going well. Just not easy. And did I mention all at once. You will notice I have said nothing about anything truly serious or life threatening that is going on. We have none of that. Of course you wouldn’t think so with my recent outbursts.  I seem to have forgotten who the enemy is…
This is the list of things he has been taking from me lately.
• my self-confidence
• confidence in choices made for our family
• my joy
• my happiness
• my trust in God
• sleep
• time
• goodness
• peace
• quiet
• kindness
• patience
• good eating habits
• exercise
• did I mention confidence?
So here is what I’ve determined. Well, God and me.
1. Satan is a liar.
2. He does not want me to trust God.
3. He steals.
4. He wants to destroy.
5. I (we – God and me) will not let him.

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